Tonight I'm really missing my baby girl. It hit me like a ton of bricks tonight. When I was about 4 or 5 months pregnant we ran into an old friend of ours. While sitting down and chatting he mentioned he was going to have another baby. Well guess what? Scrolling through Facebook, I see that his baby girl was born. Ouch. That one stung. As I saw his newborn baby girl's picture all I could think of was how we were both suppose to have babies. Well we both did, but his baby is here and mine is in heaven. It's hard to be happy for people when they have what you want. I just want my baby girl. I just want Kinsley..
Tomorrow her headstone is suppose to be finished. We've been waiting on her coping to get finished and finally they are doing it. I'm excited to decorate her resting place. She deserves a beautiful resting place and that I will give her. I hope getting this all done will make me feel a little better. I've been waiting for months to decorate for her. I have lots of nice items I've gathered for her. Of course, all over the top. So me, so I know she will appreciate that! All I have is her grave site. That's the only thing left for me. So to me, this is a big deal. Is very important it looks beautiful.
I'm in such a weird place in my grief. I'm not sure how to even describe it. I just miss her so much. Hoping tomorrow brings something new in this process.
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