Two weeks

Yupp, it's been two weeks since Kinsley was born. Two long, hard, and depressing weeks. It seems as if the days keep passing and I'm just standing still. Night time is always the worst too... I can't sleep and then when I have to wake up, I just want to sleep all day. How much I'd love to just sleep my days away right now. Then I wouldn't have to feel this emptiness and sadness all the time. At the grocery store I ran into a woman who was very pregnant and all I could think was why does she get her baby but I couldn't have mine? Of course I ended up in tears..l always do in public. I just hate being out and seeing people so happy with their lives when I'm so clearly miserable.  No, I'm beyond miserable. There are no words that can express how I feel. I wouldn't wish this pain on my worst enemy. This is a pain nobody should ever have to feel. If I could have one wish, it would be to have one more day with her. One more day of her kicks and rolls and jabs. One more day of laying in bed laughing as my stomach moved and wondering what she was doing in there. One more day to wonder who she was going to look like and who she was going to be. But that will never happen. All that was ripped away from me 2 weeks ago..