Rough night

Everyone keeps saying the days will get easier and the pain will get less everyday- seems as if the pain gets worse everyday. I laid on the bedroom floor and cried tonight. This was the first time since the funeral I actually bawled. I feel like I've been numb since that day. It's times like these I wish she was here so I could cuddle with her, but then again if she was here I wouldn't be crying. The pain is like no other. Carrying a child to almost full term, then losing her? It's not fair. I miss her everyday. I love that we buried her so close to home and I can visit her anytime.. I did visit her tonight actually, and I cried my eyes out at her grave. The nice part is going to see her, the hard part is leaving. That's when it hits that I will actually never bring her home. I'm never going to get to do anything with her. All the things I had planned for her...for us. All just ripped away. I just wish I knew why. I just wish I could bring her back..